If I find in myself a desire
There is a mystery sown deep in us before we are even born.
It rests in the epicenter of our being, a built-in homing beacon as it were, that sets in us a longing.
The longing becomes our navigating point. Our North Star.
That longing, deep and persistent in you, is the truest part of you.
”Reason” will often deny it as will the voices of others.
“How can you want something that doesn’t exist?” You have heard that probably. So have I.
For many years I even tried to believe it.
But in the stillness when I can hear my own soul speak with her own clear voice
and I hear the ‘still, small voice’ of God
I know that what I long for is Real though it is not here yet.
My whole soul and spirit recognizes it from afar and recognizes it nearby.
Everything that is Good, and True, and Beautiful around me points to it
declaring its great certainty.
I become like Puddleglum in The Silver Chair declaring his statement of faith
against the enchantment of the Green Lady.
“. . .Suppose we have only dreamed, or made up, all those things–
trees and grass and sun and moon and stars and Aslan himself.
Suppose we have.
Then all I can say is, in that case, the made-up things seem
a good deal more important than the real ones.
Suppose this black pit of a kingdom of yours is the only world.
Well, it strikes me as a pretty poor one.
And that’s a funny thing, when you come to think of it.
We’re just babies playing a game, if you’re right.
But four babies playing a game can make a play-world which licks your real world hollow.
That’s why I’m going to stand by the play-world.
I’m on Aslan’s side even if there isn’t any Aslan to lead it.
I’m going to live as like a Narnian as I can even if there isn’t any Narnia.”
Puddleglum’s declaration of faith – and sanity, mind you – is one of my favourite passages in literature.
When the voices of “reason” whisper well phrased arguments against what you know to be true
resist, even if it costs you something. It will cost something.
But remember this.
We are born here, but not born to remain here.
It takes courage to choose again every day to believe in a place that cannot be seen yet.
But it is the belief itself that proves one’s citizenship.
“But our citizenship is in heaven, and from it we await a Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ,
who will transform our lowly body to be like his glorious body,
by the power that enables him even to subject all things to himself.”